It seems HR professionals and employers are increasingly leaving candidates hanging out to dry without any feedback, closure, or even a “thanks but no thanks.” Based on various forums, blogs, and anecdotal evidence from candidates, this has become a disturbingly common and acceptable trend.

We believe it’s unprofessional to withhold feedback and resolution from candidates. Candidates deserve to know how they performed and where they stand, or at least hear they are no longer in consideration. For anyone that has dated or been in a relationship, closure is a wonderful thing.

And interviewing is basically an intense form of dating and courtship. For something as important as a job interview and potential career move, it seems reasonable to expect feedback from HR, especially if you’ve dressed up and taken several hours out of your work day for an interview.

Yet due to a high volume of applicants, busy schedules, and/or a simple lack of caring, some HR professionals and employers are dropping candidates like a hot rock once the organization makes the no-hire decision. No phone calls, emails, or even a breakup text.

As a candidate, this is essentially the equivalent of being told, “I’m just not that into you,” but within a professional context.

To all the candidates out there that have been given the bird from a prospective employer, I have three words for you: let it go. Seriously, just let it go. It’s understandable to want and expect to hear from the prospective employer. Over the course of several weeks, you can easily become emotionally invested in the outcome of your interview loop(s). Like a jilted lover, you simply want to know why.

This is not to say the employers are in the right to ignore you. They aren’t. But this is not about them. This is about you as a candidate. In life we don’t always get our way or understand why bad stuff happens. It is in your best interest to move on and create your own closure.

If you haven’t heard from HR after 3-4 weeks, you likely never will. They didn’t lose your contact info or forget to call you back, and are not waiting to pull the trigger suddenly one day. Save yourself some dignity by not stalking HR with emails and phone calls anymore. They don’t deserve the effort you are putting into trying to reach them and will only be emboldened to ignore you the more you try.

If you can bring yourself to just let them go, you will feel liberated to move on to bigger and better opportunities. Your ideal job is out there waiting for you and deserves your full attention, more so than the energy-sucking organization that has already forgotten about you like last night’s leftovers.

Finally, at this point does it really matter to know why they rejected you? It really doesn’t. All you need to know is that they liked someone else better and ultimately it wasn’t a good fit. And more importantly, it is not a poor reflection on you. Rejection happens to all of us, every day. Have faith and confidence in who you are as a candidate/professional, and don’t be dependent on someone else for validation.

Sometimes they simply just aren’t that into you. And that’s all right.

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